Hi! I'm Paul, Paul McCann!

So as you all should know, it’s my birthday today, and I’ve decided to grace the internets with my pretty presence. I think techhouse.org looks much nicer this way, so I think I'll keep it like this! ^_^

Anyways, to read my personal e-journal, have a look at the entries below. Or explore the links to the left for more Tech House related pages, lol!

Mood: Elucidated and Ecstatic!

Today I murdered Robert. I managed to finally eradicate the presence of the Hobbit Mafia and dispose of that Moon Princess. Today is a day of celebration in Techpaulogy House as we are safe from invaders and those who would steal our precious resources.

I return to you oh residents of Techpaulogy house 1.21 jiggawatts of server power that he used. You may know note that the general ambient noise of Techpaulogy house has decreased, as it should.

I have recorded for your enjoyment the death of the traitor princess.

First here you can see him after we first poisoned him. Note how he is trying to hide himself in his Hobbit Mafia outfit, but we could tell who he was and eliminate him.

Next we contained him and he was full of anger, you can see it in his eyes and in his face, as he fights to live.

See as he struggles for dear life, but even he succumbs to despair as he accepts his fate. He knew that he had to OBEY my commands, and I commanded death.

Today I feel pretty damn good. Nothing quite beats the feel of the gingersnap tingling your mouth and having a woman on either side. To top it off we have a little Fritz Long and some Irish Commedy on the screen. Life doesn't get much better then this.

I've been a fool. I don't know how that happened. Today was awful and it was all my fault. I don't know why I failed so much, but perhaps this is something I've really known is true, but I just didn't want to admit. How can I live in this manner, knowing these truths and these falsehoods and these lies I've been living?

I'll have to try again, perhaps to restart things, but can I even do so? If the flaw is a core part of me, can I really change? I've been doing it for so long that it is more than just second nature; I don't even notice that I do it. On occasion I can sit here and look back on my own actions and I can pick it out, but the problem is that it seems natural now. How do I change this bad thing which is natural to something I don't do? It seems really hard to just well, sit there and consciously change such a fundamental habit.

I want to change, but it is so hard for me to. Do I even have the power to change, or even if I do try, how can I evade it all being for naught? How do I stop myself from simply repeating the same faults, the same sins? Is it even worth the effort that I'll spend? How do I know that it all won't backfire? That the added effort won't simply be all for waste? Damn it. But if I don't try, then what? What can I do other then sit here? I'll have to do something, but do I have the power to change? I'll have to try and look at tomorrow positively, if I can. And I pray to the gods that it doesn't all backfire...